When You Say Nothing at All: Non-Disclosure in Intimate Relationships
Abstract
8 interviews and 2 groups of ginabayang talakayan revealed the range of motivations/intentions that increased the probability of non-disclosure of a significant other in an intimate heterosexual relationship and the range of reactions elicited by the non-disclosure. The researchers also looked into the possible topics that were often not disclosed. We found that the range of motivations for non-disclosure, largely based on the anticipated consequences after disclosure, could be classified into three depending on who will benefit: a) self-centered non-disclosure; b) other-oriented non-disclosure; and c) kapwa-oriented non-disclosure. To put this range of motivations into context, a cognitive model, which suggests the steps a discloser goes through in deciding whether to disclose or not, was posited. Finally, the benefits of non-disclosure in increasing the level of intimacy in a relationship, with emphasis on the shared identity of the two people involved in the,,,